Posts Tagged ‘T-Pain’

In the wake of all the hype stemming from the release of the acts for Coachella 2011, I decided to do a little research. First, I had never even heard of Coachella before and found out that it was a music festival near Palm Springs, CA similar to a modern version of Woodstock where hipsters come together and camp out for 3 days while doing shrooms and trippin out to 162 (if I counted correctly) different acts.

Of the hundred plus different acts I recognized Kanye, Wiz, Lauryn Hill, The Black Keys, and like 4 DJs. I understand that their lineup stretches across a multitude of genres of music, bringing thousands of people with different tastes of music and different types of marijuana from afar to a single patch of grass. However, this obviously isn’t necessarily my cup of tea.

Therefore, I have devised a set list for the miniscule percentage of the population like me who only get their music from listening to www.hotnewhiphop.com and “Tiger Beat Magazine.” Mackinchella 2011 will feature the latest in “hip-pop” music ranging from Drake to 5ive. Aside from the presumably obvious headliners from this genre that will be in attendance, I would like to focus on the openers and more forgotten acts of the last 10 years. I have gone into great detail so that you don’t have to familiarize yourself again with the music of our recent past and childhood.

Nick Lachey

I feel that SAE, Nick Lachey, is completely underrated as an artist and a husband. He was the driving force behind 98 Degrees and had a decent solo career while riding the coattails of Jessica Simpson. This song is obviously about the infamous breakup over Buffalo Wings but is a great song nonetheless. Swear to God, I would listen to this song on repeat for hours on end while sleeping on stand, lifeguarding at Caesars Palace.”Falling faster, barely breathing, give me something to believe in.” I mean they just don’t make music like this anymore.

BB Mak

“Back Here” is very similar to “What’s left of me” melodically and that is why I like it. Actually, I’m lying, I don’t even really know what melody means, but it reminds of this song a little a bit. I remember sitting around brainstorming songs for serenades in 2006 and when this little gem hit me, it had the panties flying from Lied Library to the old SU. I don’t know if it was our fake British accents our Pete’s sweet and innocent guitar skills but this song just leaves you feeling all tingly inside.

Backstreet Boys

Danielle isn’t exactly ecstatic that this is my favorite BSB song of all time but at the same time she can’t help but singing along with me. “Black and Blue” was their best album to date that is if their collaboration with NKOTB doesn’t knock them off. It had the nice flamenco guitar, plenty of bass to make your trunk rattle rolling down MLK Jr Blvd, and even enough snare for Eminem’s headphones.

Fabolous

This rap joint has a nice summatime/bubble gum pop feel to it, right? Fabo is one of my all time favorite rappers. Some of the bars he comes up with is absolutely unheard of. This song almost made me propose by saying to Danielle “But since you been ‘aksin’ bout da friends, how’d you like it if bof ah names had Mackin on da end”? Almost, but I felt like I didn’t wanna feel like a wigger when I was old telling people how I proposed.

Spin Doctors

This is just one of those where if it catches you in a good mood on shuffle you will pretend to know the lyrics by scating along but in reality you are off. Then the only lyrics you do know are “And if you wanna call me baby, just go ahead now baby.” That’s it. You can pretend to know the rest by mumbling or looking away when you bob your head (that’s what I do) but everyone will know you don’t know them because they don’t know them either.

En Vogue

En Vogue was Destiny’s Child when Kelly Rowland was still in playing “Skip It” and Beyonce was taping up Jonathan Taylor Thomas posters to the back of her door. I feel like this song is what Cougar and Jaguar divorcees worldwide, play when they have “tupperware parties” once they’re all red wine drunk and feeling slippery. They had some pipes on them and could really belt out some high and powerful notes across the whole Mackinchella Valley.

Brandy and Monica

I feel like “The Boy is Mine” was the theme song for most girls in middle school to act like they were cooler than they were. They would act a little more ghetto than they were and pretend to have serious relationships with guys they hugged for the first time walking into 4th period and break up with them before 2:11pm. They then would run home and call their boyfriends on their personal land lines and try to “punt” the other girls off of AIM.

Cher

If this song never came out back in the day, and came out tomorrow it would still be hot. People think T-Pain was the Godfather of Auto-tune when in reality it is Cher, that Jay-Z should be writing songs about. Especially with all of the house and techno beats infused into hip-pop music today, you could hear this song on the radio and think it was Ke$ha.

O-Town

Goosebumps right? Yeah, Ashley Parker Angel does that to me too. This song is for the long awaitied return of the 2nd best form of man-made and manufactured music from Orlando www.okmagazine.com/2011/01/o-town-boys-are-reuniting-making-new-music/. They weren’t the best boy bad ever but let’s be honest they had some stiff competition and at least this song was a lot better than “Liquid Dreams” lol.

I hope this little snippet gives you an idea of the type of music you can listen to in a fun and completely drug-free environment. The event will be hosted by Snooki from “The Jersey Shore” and Rex Ryan from the New York Jets (now that he has plenty of spare time) and Sean Hannity. While the acts’ groupies are switching out the instruments (not that any of these acts play instruments, but their bands do) one TV screens we will be showing episodes of “Boy Meets World” in 3D, “PTI,” and “Diners, Drive-Ins, and Drives.”

Tickets go on sale 1/31/11 and can be purchased from any Foot Locker location or online at www.jonmackin.wordpress.com. Be sure to get your tickets fast because hotel rooms will fill up quick. Thank you.

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On this Frivolous Friday, I have decided to put my music producer hat on. I am always thinking of different mixes that could be made by songs with similar lyrics rather than beats. By setting them both on a similar beat it would allow for a seamless transition unrecognizable by even the most sober person when the beat drops in Tao at 3am.

Every Christmas, different Christmas albums are released by pop and country music artists but it is on rare occasion that hip-hop or rap artists release a Christmas album. And rightfully so, an entire Christmas album by Soullja Boy might not do to well, but what if it were a compilation album put together by super producer, Mix-Masta MC Mackin? Well, this is no longer a fable and this highly touted project is now in the works for Christmas 2011. Here is a sneak peek of what you can expect.

“Little Drummer Boy” by Jay-Z and Travis Barker: The holes that Travis Barker drills in his snare for an even louder baseline will provide a modern take on a Christmas classic. Jay-Z is mainstream enough now to have this be the first single off the album as it will be performed live on SNL as well. If you can’t imagine the blending of the 2 songs, this will give you an audio sense of what the track will emulate.

“Santa Baby” by Nikki Minaj feat. Lil Wayne: Nikki has completely exploded on the music scene and has already surpassed Lil Kim and Foxxy Brown with only Missy Elliot left to conquer as the best female rapper of all time. She has the delivery and sultriness to make this flirty song a song that you wouldn’t think twice about if it were heard on “Pink Friday.” Wayne will step in da boof on the third verse for his take on “Weezy Baby.”

“The First Noel” by Juelz Santana and Jim Jones: Santana Aightttt! It’s Dipset! These two aren’t the most talented in their craft but they do have their demographic and fan base in New York. So, I would like them to perform this version in Rockefeller Center at the lighting of the tree ceremony. Just imagine “Juelz” being said in the same note as “Noel.”

“Jingle Bells” DJ Khaled and T-Pain: We da best! Who?!?! Jingle Bells! Auto-tune may have died but this holiday staple will resurrect it back to life. The opportunities for a typical Terror Squad beat combined with the bells are exponential. This one is a little hard to describe, so I guess the best way is to just let your mind wander by listening.

“Santa Claus is Coming to Town” Wiz Khalifa: Wiz is just young enough to make this playful song seem like he didn’t have to entirely reinvent the wheel for this “joint.” His creative word play would allow for many puns comparing The North Pole to Pitt, the elves to Taylor Gang, rolling up Christmas list scrolls to something else that Wiz is good at rolling…

“Let It Snow” Girl Talk and Fat Joe feat. Lil Wayne: This song was made famous by Dean Martin and none of the original quality will be lost as Girl Talk mashes up this classic on New Years Eve 2011 live from Prive’ at Planet Hollywood. The performance will start out as fake snow begins to fall from the rafters then Fat Joe slowly but surely jumps behind the boof and makes it rain as Wayne runs through the crowd frantically.

“We Wish You A Merry Christmas” by Kanye West and Kid Cudi: The hook will be sung by Kanye’s trademark chipmunked voices. Cudi will provide a little hope for the city of Cleveland because God knows they need it with LeBron gone. They both are a little out there so the result of this track could go anywhere but I’m guessing it will sound somewhat along the lines of this…

“Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer” by Justin Bieber and Rihanna: I had throw one pop song on the album. And what a better way to recreate the youth and innocence than with the cutest young pop star since Justin Timberlake wore shiny, light blue Adidas track pants when he performed live from Disney World with N* Sync. Rihanna will hop on at the end in a mini Santa dress to sing some back-up and do her knee wiggle dance.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CHVhwcOg6y8&fs=1&hl=en_US