Posts Tagged ‘B.o.B.’

Most Mondays I like to start off with a “My Life Monday” but with nothing Earth-shattering or ground breaking happening in my life over the weekend, I thought I would give a review of last night’s Grammys. After all the dust has settled and the rumors of the after-parties are swirling, some people may actually forget there was an actually an award show last night.

So, I feel it is my patriotic duty to provide a quick recap for all those who forgot what happened or went to bed early. This blog will focus less on the writing format and will be in more of a play-by-play format, so that you can read the blog in a few minutes.

What a better way to open up the show with a real soulful woman, Aretha Franklin. Jennifer Hudson looks great! I guess Weight Watchers really does work and I’m just glad Christina Augilera got the words right even though she took a little spill still. I bet she could make me some bomb chicken and waffles too. Ricky Martin wore silver pants, typical.

Lady Gaga disgusts me! I’m sorry I just cannot stomach her. Only she would perform a song called “I was born this way” while wears horns implanted into her shoulders and forehead. Yeah, that’s not hypocritical. Her backup dancers looked like a bunch of WWF Golddusts.

Miranda Lambert is good, she just not my cup of tea. I can’t believe Lenny Kravitz cut the dreads! Muse scares me. B.o.B. is the homie and a lot more than just a rapper. Did anyone else notice that Bruno Mars and the Janelle Monet have the same hair-do? They probably get their coke from the same dude too. The Mo-town flare on “Grenade” was unique and good because I was getting sick of hearing that song in its original version. Janelle Monet was cute I guess but I prefer me some Willow Smith though. I love me some Mo-town.

Guess who? Jaden Smith with leopard skinny jeans, he is friggin adorable! I want to rent him as my future son. Justin Bieber is talented I don’t care what people say about how manufactured he is. Will, Jada, and Willow clapping almost brought a tear to my eye watching their son/brother during his first performance. Usher is so wack with his same dance moves from when he did my way.

Muse is cool I guess they’re the only rock band who I actually knew had an album out this year. Selena Gomez is cute, I just hope she stays innocent and doesn’t get corrupted by the Lindsay Lohans of Hollywood. And presenting with Donnie Wahlberg probably isn’t the best start. Then handing off the Grammy to Lady Caca (as I like to call her) doesn’t help either, I just hope whatever it is that Lady Gaga has, isn’t contagious. It all makes sense now that she looks up to Whitney Houston even though her new stuff is ripped off Madonna.

The lead singer of Mumford and Sons looks exactly like Tim Tebow! I almost did a double-take but then remembered that Tim Tebow isn’t emo. The Grammys is a big step up for the Avett Brothers, their last Las Vegas performance was at the Silverton, literally. I didn’t even know Bob Dylan was still alive but apparently “he aint gonna work for Maggie’s Pa no more. So, I guess that shows how musically diversified I am.

Clay Matthews is a beast! Lady Antebellum is one of few country artists I know of and like, (probably because they are crossover artists) anyway, their performance was good and the really cleaned up on awards. Miley Cyrus’ “country roots” weren’t the only things that were showing with Kings of Leon. Jamie Foxx had a Grammy and Oscar!

Who knew? Cee-lo has the most annoying voice in music and he wore the most ridiculous outfit I have ever seen. He looks like the love child of Scott Steiner and a peacock with his muppet band. Gwyenth Paltrow was surprisingly good and she was even better in “Country Strong,” good thing she didn’t fall off the piano.

Katy Perry’s voice isn’t great but she is nice to look at so I give her performance a B+. You can tell she started off probably the singer for a rock band and whoever discovered her said “lose the guys with the ripped jeans and tattoos, we have back-up dancers with N* Sync choreography for that.” She had a Powerpoint presentation of her wedding behind her while performing, which was cool I thought. She should have done “Teenage Dream” with Keenan Cahill, that would have been really smart.

“Jolene” performed by Keith Urban, Johnny Depp’s stunt double, John Mayer, and Norah Jones for Dolly Parton was pretty good. It had some fancy guitar playing that I appreciated. Seth Rogen has broken the curve of going from fat to skinny while remaining funny, a task hard to overcome in Hollywood.

Rihanna has looked better but she is still my RiRi. Adam Levine from Maroon 5 on the keys was a nice touch to performance. Eminem went H.A.M. as usual and I’m glad he finally stopped wearing super baggy pants. I would love to see him in a nice suit (no homo). I hate to say it but Dre needs to stay behind the scenes from now on, instead of on stage. He looked like Pro Bowler and ESPN Analyst, Marcellus Wiley up there.

Jewel looked pretty and I never really like John Legend, I don’t know why. Who is Esperanza Spalding? JB or Drizzy Drake should have won best new artist, but that is just me. Mick Jagger is legendary but when it comes to drug-ridden, rock and roll lead singers with wide mouths, Steven Tyler has my vote. Mick’s tapping of his right foot was to a completely different beat of his left foot, it just didn’t do it for me. Barbara Streisand is well Bobra. That’s enough about her! Nicki Minaj just has balls and that’s why I like her and her hair helmet.

Detroit stand up! I’m happy Eminem won best rap album because he is a handsome man even though I’m partial to my boy HOVA, who sadly wasn’t in attendance. P. Diddy is officially the goofiest dude in hip hop, I feel uncomfortable for him, he tries way too hard and just needs to give it up.

Now, that’s the RiRi I like, no one does the knee wiggle dance better. If anyone knows where she got the African drummers from, let me know because I wanna book them for my wedding. J-Lo looks good as always even though Marc Anthony looks like her cracked out little brother.

I’m going to be honest, I had no idea who Arcade Fire was prior to Jason Siegel introducing them and I wish it would have stayed that way. I have never been so happy to have been blinded by flashing strobe lights during a musical performance. I just thank God that Matt Hoffman and the other BMX riders weren’t hurt. I don’t know how they won album of the year! Either it was rigged, or I have been living under a rock for the last year.

I am not the most cultured person when it comes to music but I would like to think that when something is new and interesting that I can give credit where credit is due. With all of the resources the academy had available to them, I thought the collaborative performances seriously lacked creativity. All in all,  I would give this year’s Grammys a C+.

I don’t really know where I want to go with this blog but being a “Chooseday Tuesday” I figured I would let my mind flow into my index fingers (because I still look at keyboard and type with two fingers) and whatever comes out, well comes out. It is that time of year where college students around the world (on a semester schedule) fill the lounges of Starbucks and invest in 5 Hour Energy Shots.

It wasn’t until my super senior year  of college that I realized what good studying actually was. It involved going to class, paying attention in class, taking decent notes, reviewing them frequently, and going over them again in-depth prior to the final while upon receipt of the study guide. Another good trick is to only study in 45 minute increments because your brain can only focus at full strength for that amount of time.

So, in this educational week it is my fiduciary duty to pass on this knowledge to all students. Study for 45 minutes and then take a 15 minute break. Then repeat. However, I cannot take credit for this wise information and the credit is due to my good friend and world renown studier, Nick Wesling. Now the only remaining question is how will you utilize your 15 minute breaks to maximize the retention of the information applicable to your finals?

That’s where I come in. I have compiled a short play list of non H1N1 viral videos to keep you on your toes and your heart light in what can be a very stressful week. These videos are intended to give you a quick little smile break from studying. However, they do come with a Surgeon General’s warning that they are contagious, so do not watch in excess. Side effects may include: songs stuck in head, random laughter outbursts, and sneezing.

The “Harlem Shake,” the “Stanky Leg,” and the “Douggie” have nothing on this new dance craze. The “Bernie” is the hottest new form of interpretive dance that is sweeping the across the Bible Belt. It is recommended that this dance is done prior to a final to loosen up all of your muscles in preparation for what could be a tense hour or so. The quality is not up to par quite yet but I’m sure it is only a matter of time before Wiz Khalifa and B.o.B. hop in da boof for a remix.

This next video is almost as ridiculous as the “Bernie.” I recently came across three young gentleman from the prestigious University of Oregon, who go by the name of Supwhitchugirl. These three young men make me wish I would have gone to the U of O, met them playing intramural basketball, and thus transformed the trio into a quad because they remind me a lot of myself anf friends. This video has gone viral and become the official “fight video” for the Ducks’ championship run.

This next video is also off from the rap supergroup, Supwitchugirl. Behind the quick lyrics and jerker outfits there is an unheard amount of talent. From the writing of the songs, to the production of the videos, to the search for early 90s Nike windbreakers, these three kids are the reason I want my sons to grow up in the Pacific Northwest, despite never setting foot outside of an airport there.

This other hit from Supwitchugirl brings me right back to my childhood. Well my teenage years, where we would hop the fence of Selma Bartlett Elementary to play basketball on the eight foot hoops. I still believe in  my heart, that when on eight foot hoops, I am the best dunker in the world, pulling creative dunks out of my ass that would have Luke Ridnour and Luke Jackson wishing they showed me around campus on recruiting trips. I also have a special place in my heart for this video because I too still save all of my Champion (brand) NBA jerseys in a kids size 40 from middle school.

This next video comes to you from the best History AP teacher in America, Mr. Jeff Johnson. Mr. Johnson and I hit it off ever since Junior year of high school, when I showed up on the first day of school wearing my Larry Johnson UNLV throwback. From that day forth we had a bond held together by a respect for local basketball excellence. We both held similar positions in UNLV’s student government and he still is UNLV’s #1 fan from the net-cutting days of the early 90s, to the grey days of the Early 2000’s with Mark Dickel, to our current ascending return to greatness.

This last video I will leave you with is something to get you in the holiday mood. It twas the night before Christmas of 2006 and our hearts were open wide and these two comedic and musical geniuses gave us something that was on their mind. They were wise enough to when a gift needs giving and they knew just the one. It’s their dick in a box!