That’s right “American Idol” is back and celebrating its 10th season in commission. The show that has people of all shapes and sizes glued to the TV January-May is back on Wednesdays and Thursdays at 8pm on the channel where news is fair and balanced, FOX. I had to throw a little plug in there (even though they are just as biased as the liberal networks).

Anywho, Seacreast and your dog and mine, Randy Jackson, are back but with some new plastic surgery ridden faces. My dude, Ellen, had a short and sweet stint on Idol and is over so she can concentrate on shopping for cardigan sweaters and khaki pants. Our favorite villain, Simon Cowell has decided to retire from his tough job of telling people they were “dreadful” so he can continue to perooze and galavant around Britain and Lake Las Vegas (just as long he wasn’t foreclosed on like the rest of the community) with his adult film star lady friends.

Kara DioGuardi also will not return to the Kodak Theatre this season as she will further her pursuits of writing music and coug-ing around. And thank God Paula Abdul was not asked to return after a season off. While some people found her pleasant, Idol found her salary wasn’t so high it was the clause in her contract requesting that her insurance plan require extensive prescriptions for medicines. Plus she has smaller fish to fry on her new show “Live to Dance,” that we will get to later.

With these star-studded celebrity judges pursuing other endeavors, how will the reality show be able to compensate with a level of credibility as well as star power? Idol thinks they have assembled a team headed up by Aerosmith front man, Steven Tyler. They feel that the spider monkey look-a-like will be able to judge with a sense of experience, while also being able to fill Simon’s shoes with wit and brashness.

If his credibility isn’t enough, Idol really brings the heat with by bringing on a former “In Living Color” back-up dancer? That’s right Jenny from the block, who is more famous for her hind parts than her vocal chords, will be judging the contestants on their ability to sing. We can only hope for some fireworks from her as I’m sure she is bound to get her fair share of criticism of whether or not her opinions should hold water. However, I think we all liked this song…

With these high-powered personalities invading our evenings, this season of Idol has the makings for plenty of awkward drama and drama = laughter for me at least. I could really care less if they find the next singing sensation, as I am more concerned with the next viral hits like “Pants on the Ground,” William Hung, and these other characters.

With Paula Abdul not there to make people feel better about sucking at singing she had gone back to her roots of telling people they suck at dancing where she actually has some credibility in the field. Her new show “Live to Dance” has kicked off its first season Wednesday nights on CBS at 8pm. The season is already well into its 2nd round of semi-finals ( I know I was shocked too).

From the one episode that I have seen, it seems as though LTD is a combination of “American’s Got Talent,” “Americas Best Dance Crew,” “So You Think You Can Dance,” and “General Hospital.” Paula Abdul and two other nameless judges scour the country searching for the next big thing in dance. Whether it is a solo, pair, or full crew, the contestants are judged on their uniqueness and level of difficulty.

I don’t really know what the reactions or ratings of this show look like nor do I care really. I think the show sucks as it isn’t half as good as its derived shows. And not even being half as good as “America’s Got Talent” means it must really suck to me. The show is kind of like a roller coaster for someone who thinks they have motion sickness issues. You don’t think you’ll like it but you have to give it a whirl just to validate your preconceptions of getting sick.

So, watch the show once or better yet DVR it so you can fast forward through the shows and catch the commercials and take your ratings elsewhere to “American Idol” where the first round auditions are bound to produce a few laughs and maybe hook you for the remainder of the season like Carrie Underwood hooked me. Ladies, insert tears here…

Mackin out.

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